Did you hear me or was I too loud?
I tried to scream, but I did not like the sound.
The way the earth shakes as my eyes open.
Tells me that maybe I will not make it.
That I am the root to the destruction the world sees.
That I hurt my people just so I could feel the pain.
I cry my tears so they could feel my pain.
Then I dream that they came.
When my eyes open, I realize everything was the same.
Then I remember that it is all because of me.
It is time for a change.
Will I make the right decision and go the right way?
I keep thinking this is not right for me.
Yet I stay here, and I do not know where to go.
My heart does not belong to me.
It is in a box that is covered with the sins that I cannot see.
I feeling it beating, but it does not look like me.
The changes that I want are something that just cannot be.
When will my mind start to matter to me?
When will I get up the courage and let this all be?
When will I just learn to love me?
I do not know, but tomorrow is another for me to learn and see.
One day I want to be able to love me.
What do you see when you look at me?
Do you see the sense of hurt that hangs from my sleeve?
Do you see the lust of worries that stares deep in my eyes?
Do you see the mounting of stress that makes me not breathe?
The things that look good no longer feels or see me.
The thought of being a person that no one can see is becoming attractive to the eye.
Living in a place that brings no hope for the day.
The things that make you smile now bring the tears down the eyes.
When you see me are you seeing me?
Are you seeing the person that I want you to, see?
Think before you speak, this book cover is not what you think.
I love you.
I love you.
The three hardest words to say.
Yet with you they fall off my tongue.
I have written these words before, but I never meant them with love.
This time with you all I do is say them with love.
I am thankful for these words.
They have given me the opportunity to be the person I have always wanted to be.
Now as I lay here looking at the rising sun all I can think about is that I love you.
These words will never grow tired.
They will only deepen the wound that my heart held for so long.
Once again, I must say that I love you for the rest of my days.